"It's like climbing a tree, you can never go down when there's no stairs"... berns
these words were from my classmate Berns just a few weeks ago. I suddenly realize that he was very right in saying this. when you climb a mountain or a tree you need a rope or a wooden stairs to help you go down or else evrything will be harder on you or you might even get yourself hurt if you don't have something to help you go down.
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i realize that i'm still in that situation that i myself is the primary reason i can't get out. i'm stuck in that moment forever when no one's forcing me to remain there,it's just me and it's my fault. one can never move on if one doesn't have someone to cling on. one needs another person to pass on that attention. i'm not saying that you have to find someone to replace that person and make him (it's better said in tagalog.) as "panakip butas".what i'm saying is that when you are in a painful and disastrous moment you need someone to console you without the intention that you are just using him to do get someone else out of your stupid head.
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i learned that you should also be open about possibilities. i mean, i myself is a bit cold to guys and i never like the idea of textmate. come on, i never believe that one can fall inlove just by words without seeing each other. we'll see if that's true when that two persons will finally meet eye to eye and if one them is not physically blessed that love love thing in text will quickly out of your sight.that's proven you see though i haven't had any experience but i've heard lots and that's enough. that is why im not encouraging this idea to get myself caught up in a wild situation.what i mean about being open is that we someone comes to you in a nice manner take note, there's no reason to close the door when you see that he's quite serious. you should see ech other firts and not the other way around.
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i am still not over him until now. if i count the years, i think it's almost three years but take note he didn't court me, i was just in the background until now. the reason why i can't be over him is that there's no one else involve with me right now.that is why i can't go down and i can't move on. i don't if that stairs, or that brifge will ever come my way. if not i think i'll be forever stuck in his background.
