(Photo by Janice Sabnal )
article.wn.com

Summer Rain

I hate the rain. But I also hate the sun. People just couldn’t get enough, do they? It’s been raining since I got back from Baguio last 13. This is so unusual in the Philippines especially in Manila, to be raining like this in summer. Is this another sign of global warming are we seeing? I don’t really remember having summer here where it’s raining. I honestly think, this is only happening now.

Like I said, I hate the rain especially when the city goes flooded. How can I even manage to go home, without letting my feet get dip in dirty canal water? That’s just gross. It really sucks when it floods. It happens all the time, more so when it rains hard or when there’s a typhoon. Then I see kids at our neighborhood enjoying the rain, and the flood that instantly became their public swimming pool. The kids are enjoying along with floating cockroaches and rats on the road.

However, I’m not saying that I like the sun. I don’t like the sun either and its scorching heat. It’s really a pain whenever its summer here especially in Manila. Thank God, I had the chance to go to Baguio and have a breather from the sweltering heat in the metro. I love Baguio; it’s really nice to live there. Besides, it’s nearer to my province. I even thought of relocating there, if there will be chances. I’d definitely love to go back especially when it’s really hot in Manila.

Summer Rain, this might be the first time I’d ever experience such summer in Manila. It’s really weird to be seeing rain, even floods in a season we call summer. Perhaps, we should change how we call it then. Maybe we should just call it the Summer Rain season.

The Red Shield

The Red Shield, a righteous term to describe this awesome vintage car. I got the term from Blood +, wherein Red Shield is a powerful organization in pursuit of Chiropterans. Anyway, we’re not in pursuit of Chiropterans here; instead we’re in pursuit of nice cars.

We accidentally saw this car, while walking along Session Road in Baguio. It might belong to a restaurateur, who owns one of the establishments along Session Road. It was really striking; we couldn’t resist not taking pictures of it. The guy’s got such a nice looking car I’ve ever seen. I could only dream. I’m not really a car junkie kind of person. I’m not into cars or any that involves auto mechanics. But I just really find this car to be so beautiful. To whoever who owns it, he must be rich and lucky.

April 25, 2009
2:00 AM

Two in the Morning

I’m writing this at exactly 2:00 AM. As to why I’m still up, I just feel like doing it. It’s been a while since I’ve been up this late. I’m still awake even though I have to go to work tomorrow. Besides, I don’t need to go early cause it’s a Saturday. Plus the fact that I hate going to work on Saturdays, but oh well I don’t have a choice. It may seem like my punishment for my absenteeism last April 13. What’s done is done.

I’ve been busying myself at this wee hour watching Blood + Episode 23, which I missed earlier during Studio 23 primetime. I’ve been taking pictures of Haji by pausing the episodes and taking a close good shot of him with my phone. You see, I love this guy a lot; more than I do with the real bastard one.

It’s just real quiet at this hour and I really liked it. I don’t work in a call center but I’m used to this type of sleeping habit. And I just love to be alone at times, in this quiet hour in the comfort of my very own sanctuary. My mind tends to wander at these times.

I remember, I’ve been wondering for almost the whole day; if someone has been bothered these past few weeks. But I guess, he isn’t bothered at all. I’m sure by the way I know him, he’ll just call it nothing out of ordinary. Anyway, I don’t have any business with him anymore. I just hope it will stay like this permanently.

I will likely end this night with a few pages of Norwegian Wood, which I’m rereading now. I’ve always done this at night especially during Friday nights. I’d stay up as late as 4:00 AM just with the pleasure of my book. So from here on, I guess I’m about to take some few pages and sleep. So I’m off.

Two in a Row


It’s been two years since I graduated college. Looking back, I couldn’t help but feel discontented and disgusted about myself and what I’ve really become. We were rooted with the notion that, if you graduate with honors in college; things will open much better for you. But they were wrong and we were wrong to believe such a false predicament. With all the discrimination surrounding in this crappy country, it wasn’t as easy as they wanted us to think it will be. I hate it when I see some ads that say, “WE PREFER GRADUATES OF LA SALLE, ATENEO, UP “. I really hate it, sure I wanted to get to UP then and I had nothing against these schools. However, this is a form of ridicule. I mean, how can someone get a fair chance; when at the start you’ve been put down already? Another scenario, when a clever kid from a not – so high end school luckily landed a job in super elite company; the discrimination is all over him. Just being with people from the Big 3; seniors and others; and the way they look at you is nothing but mockery.

My official first taste was as an Events and Communication Assistant in a health related company in Makati. I did like the work and I found most people there to be really nice and accommodating for an amateur like me. I’ve never really been someone who’s headstrong and beaming with overzealous confidence. But they were really friendly to me, especially Ate Irene, Kuya Bombet and Ms. Leizel. I had a good time staying with their company except for one. I really like my job, I get to write with the newsletter, although it’s wasn’t really rigorous writing but I like it. And, I get to exercise my lay outing skills. Apart from these, I do events once in a while. It was practically just me most of the time. I only get some help with Ms. Leizel and Kuya Noel but majority was all upon me. But then, one couldn’t be so happy.

I spent two months finding a replacement job. I did get to be accepted in a certain company, but I just had this nagging feeling that something wasn’t right. Then I finally landed a job in a public relations firm. At first, everything seemed to be doing well because everything was so new to me. I didn’t really care much about politics then. This was really at par with my previous work. But this work made me more aware about politics and media; it wasn’t actually a bad thing at all. However, after a year or so; it just really started to be just the same. I feel as if I’m walking on circles, not knowing where I’m headed. I’m really no better, I’m no good. I’m not even sure of what I’ve actually become. I’ve never even practiced my writing for the past year. I’ve been stagnant; I don’t think I’m ever using my head anymore. I’m not reaching my full capacity and the worse, I stopped learning and developing. Let’s just say, I’m bored as if I’m getting swallowed by a big shadow. Although, I also had bored sessions then but not really like this. Maybe I’m just looking for some adventure but neither am I looking for torture.

On one side, I’m not saying I don’t like my work now. I’m okay but I’m no better. I also like the people here a lot; they seem to be like a new family. I get some extra pay once in a while and I’m not just talking about over time. Although it still isn’t enough, this is beside the point. However, I know it would really help a lot. They’re really good to me particularly boss number 2. Even though he isn’t boss number one; B2 is the most generous and nicest among them. Unlike the previous one I had who wasn’t approachable in any way. However, I have to admit a fact, I think I like my old job better. I just need to be honest with myself but I like the people here better. That maybe because, were just five in the firm; unlike my previous work wherein where like 25 or something.

I honestly feel like I should do something else, other than what I’m doing now. I’m not even sure if I should start looking for a new job right now. Maybe, it could do better if I do get in that freelance writing job I applied. I just hope they call soon for the orientation. I hope I’m not getting my hopes wasted. I’m sure it will perk up my senses; my head; my body and my dormant being. If I can’t enroll this year for masterals, I might as well just enroll for a language course or some photography; writing workshops I could find. If I can’t find any chance of development in my work now, then I’ll just have to find something on my own.

I just feel so worthless at times. I think this life is stupid. I just have to do something. Something that I’m not doing as of the moment.

Kei and Hikari

2 April 09

S.A.

Special A, I’ve discovered this anime series quite late on tv5. I wasn’t able to start the series; I think the episode I first saw was episode 16 or something. It’s almost nearing the end of the series. However, I immediately fell in love with the series despite not being able to watch the first episodes. The series is so wacky, funny, and romantic all at the same time. And I really like the characters especially Kei Takishima, one of the main protagonists in the series. I can really relate to him, we’re alike in almost all possible ways. He’s cold, quiet, stoic, mysterious, confident and devoted independent teen who sneers a lot, and can be a bully. I on the other hand, also quite cold, mysterious, stoic, devoted but I don’t sneer and I’m not a bully. Well he’s actually the bully.

It’s a story of rivalry and how you find love in it. Hikari is a daughter of a chief carpenter who’s been brought up to be almost good at anything she gets into. From sports to academics and anything she could want to be involved with. Her father is an avid wrestling fan who’s friends with Satoro Takishima, the Chairman of the Takishima Group who is also Kei’s father. Satoro introduced Kei to Hikari and thus began the rivalry between Kei and Hikari. Hikari challenged Kei to a wrestling match only to be beaten up badly by Kei. Since then, Hikari had sworn to herself that she will never give up until she beats Kei. She even enrolled at Hakusen Academy, the most prestigious school in Japan just to tail Kei.


In Hakusen, Kei is the top student in the whole school and Hikari is second. Kei loves to call her Miss Rank Two. The top seven students are called S.A. However, unknown to Hikari, Kei has been in love with her since they were kids. A known fact that Kei doesn’t deny and that six of the other S.A. members are aware of. Hikari, being the dense that she is, couldn’t even notice Kei’s feelings towards her despite his cool and cold bullying manner to her at times. He never did try to confess to Hikari because he knows she won’t understand it.


I did have almost the same experience in high school. We didn’t have an S.A. class with only the top seven students, but we did have a star section wherein I and this boy were members. There’s this boy who’s not from my neighborhood but became my enemy or rival in academics, sports and extracurricular. We weren’t the first and second in the whole school respectively. During freshman year, he was actually ahead of me. He was fourth while I finished sixth during the end of the school year. But it wasn’t until we were in our sophomore year that things started to heat up between us. He became really talkative and annoying. He’s bursting with confidence like he’s the most handsome and most intelligent teen around in school. During sophomore year, things turned around in favor of my side. That’s when I started to beat him in academics, sports and extracurricular activities. I finished fifth and he was eight I guess. We were like cats and dogs. Always barking at each other every time we cross paths. I don’t know what’s wrong with him but it’s me who he teases a lot and bullies if you might call that bullying. He really was getting to my nerves then and I almost hated him for that.

While Kei and Hikari were childhood friends, I and that boy weren’t. The foundation of Kei and Hikari’s relationship friendly or romantic is so well cultivated, that they came to know and trust each other really well. Unlike us, we just met on our freshman year and we didn’t actually become close or become friends for that matter. But like Kei, I sadly ended up developing feelings for that boy. And like Kei, I’m devoted to him to the point that when he needs help I’m there always. Like Kei, I never got the nerves to confess because I’m sure the feelings not the same. But unlike Kei, Hikari loves him but she just doesn’t know how to deal with it. Like Kei, the girl he loves is so dense that she notices the unimportant things and not the important things. Like Kei, I was and am a martyr. Like Kei, I become extremely happy when he shows even the most minor kindness.

I’m Kei you see and he is Hikari. He didn’t actually challenged me to contests then, but we constantly argue as to who is better and more clever. He kept on insisting that he’s better than me at anything. He pisses me off almost everyday of our high school life as classmates. Like Hikari said to Kei, Kei was the most irritating but the most intelligent person she ever met. I must admit, that boy was and is way better than me in numbers or in Chemistry and Physics. But I am and I was way better in others. And it’s a fact that he’s the most irritating person I’ve ever met, but not exactly the most intelligent until now. Although, he did have some similarities to Kei when it comes to being proud, bossy and loves to annoy me.


In the end, Hikari sees Kei as not only a rival but a special friend and the person that she loves. And that she will also protect him at all costs. Kei on the other hand, has long been in love with Hikari. And that he will stop at nothing just to protect and help her. Me, I’ve been truthful and helpful to him. I have always regarded him as someone special since junior year. However, he doesn’t see me the way like Hikari regards Kei. Unlike Kei and Hikari who treats each other in a special romantic way, we don’t. So we’re not going to end up like Kei and Hikari who found love along the way of their rivalry.

Even though how much hope I have, it’s never going to be like it. We’re never going that way, not like Kei and Hikari.