Cum Laude

I just found out this Tuesday April3.Now finally it's official. Still I couldn't believe my eyes. I've told no one yet except Anna, Jinky and Kat. It's like really cool inside and so weird that I went this far. I couldn't believe myself. WOW. Thank you God cause you answered my prayers.But I'm happy really happy it's just that it's really very surprising still. I'm very lucky and very blessed.

Not So Over

By the way that April 15 thing,it's not gonna happen at all. It was my idea. See,he agreed so quick, that's cause he's just being pulled over to this because of the favor I'm giving him. And atleast we won't be spending so much money and time.I sure know,he doesn't want to be with me. So instead he'll just give me a graduation gift on April 15. And really there's no difference if we'll go out or he'll just come here. The things is that,if we go out,it'll just be so hard for me again. Atleast if he's just coming here,surely he won't stay long cause that's what he do always.

Disappear

April 05,2007

**************************************************************************************************************

Today is Maundy Thursday. I spent the day half sleeping and when I woke up I spent my time watching without complete immersion and thinking,deep thinking.

**************************************************************************************************************

Last night, I couldn't sleep and I was thinking in the darkness of my room about what I just did that day. After 2 monts and 2 days,we finally get to see each other again. I last saw him last January 1. It really made me upset from the time I woke up yesterday. Right, I was late but he shouldn't brag me like that. It seems like he's forgetting who's asking a favor. Was it me or him? And what's wrong with it,it's still so early so why's he so irritated. I couldn't figure him out. And because of him, I even forgot the paper in which I wrote Jackie's student number. When I arrived at Jollibee,they were not there at all. Since I forgot the paper, I went to a nearby computer shop to check again. Then he called,they were inside already. So I went in and found him with his sister. He looks just the same. It's just that he's got lots of pimples in his face. Why's that?Whenever I get to see him, he got this plenty of pimples in his face. Offourse,he sure did notice that I got my hair cut. But sure do,he won't compliment me about it. I told him that I can handle this now, you can go and he was out. The enrollment was pretty easy and fast except for the medical examination. We were finished at 11AM. I bought a lunch for the two of us at McDo and told her that after we've finished I'll text your brother to get you. But sue me,she told me when I got back that he's coming. Ohhh my,I really don't like the feeling of being watch while I eat. So I ate fast and did not enjoy my food. Then he came,he was pushing me to treat him because I gave his sister a treat. Hell no! I wasn't really talking when he sat down. I was texting,pretending. Then I said we should go cause I still need to go some place. He asked me if I had a date and where will I be going. I said just somewhere and I don't have a date. As we were walking,he was telling me about this reunion. Then go,I said. I'm not going and you should. Then we parted ways.

***************************************************************************************************************

Am I being too nice now?!Let's face it sister,you're doing this because I like him I mean more than that. Though apart from this,I like his sister too.What I really hate is that it's so hard to move away. I'm not really going to forget him totally but atleast I'll have my distance. As Elaine have told me,I should start avoiding him. That's not easy. I should not make it obvious cause ofcourse he's still my friend after all.What I also hate is that I've been doing so many things for him and yet he doesn't really know how to thank me. He never did anything for me on free will. Yes,there were times that he comes by but that was long ago. If he ever asked me out just cause I did a favor but if there's no favor he won't be doing it. He never did something for me without any reasons at all or any favor. If I asked something from him,he have this so many excuses.

*****************************************************************************************************************

Maybe I'm wrong to still be hoping that he'll ever like me or love me. Maybe he's really not going to notice and appreciate all my efforts. Maybe, I'm just going to get stucked hoping but nothing of it will be real.

bored.

hi there my blog,it's been quite a while.i'm still up at this hour because it's the only time i can be able to use this computer.it's been 1 week and 4 days since the last day of school. i spent my whole day looking like a dumbhead who finds nothing else to do than make myself look like a maid.i do the dishes, i cook, then dishes and cook again.i hated doing this. u can have me do the dishes but please not to cook.but ofcourse i don't have a choice.that's why i have to bear with it.

i hate feeling like this,not doing anything else.i'm not so much of a home buddy.i get really bored by this household chores because i hate them so.i'm not used into not going out and not going to school at all. it's just weird you know, that i will not be going to school at all.

that is why,i need to have a job atleast by may or the end of april.that is my goal.i don't want to be bored.i don't want to spend the rest of my days doing nothing and wasting my time with useless things.i will not be like the other one who doesn't even feel a thing or two.i need to have a money of my own so that i can live.i cannot forever depend on my mother.i need to do this for my own and for my mum as well.i will not be a disappointment to her.because one thing i want to do is get myself out of here and live out there alone.i have been bearing so much in this place, and now is the time for me to leave.

************************************************************************************

i am so nice.

kennedy,called me a lot of times this monday,march 26.why?because he is again asking a favor.i didn't feel like talking to him now, i don't know maybe it's because of what i have found out. he was such an actor, he even asked me what gift i like.he even said he'd come by to tell me something.only for me to find out that he wanted me to go with his younger sister to enroll at my school.he said he won't be able to do it because he has a final preboard exam.which is to my conscience if he would not be able to take it just because i didn't approve of his favor. so i just agreed.i couldn't do anything.but anyway it wasn't for him,it's for his sister.and besides, he has a reasonable answer so fine.this so nice of me, right?i really don't know what's with him that i can't disapprove him.or what's with me that i can't refuse.i'm confused but still i know partly to blame is that i like him better than being a friend.

************************************************************************************

Mall of Asia

we're supposed to meet up on april15,and it was me who initiated it ok.but since i wanted to test him and he miserably failed i shelved the idea of the meet up.i told him we meet up at greenhills.he said,it's ok for me to show up but not in a place i do not know.ok.so that's it.and last monday,he insisted that we should just meet up on april 15 so that he can repay me for helping him out with his sister.i said mall of asia.he said,it's too far.he wated it to be in san lazaro.i told him, oh you can just go yourself.and to my surprise,he immediately agreed at mall of asia.let's face it,he is just doing this because i've helped him a lot and he just wants to repay me.that's just it.

Pag-ibig nga Kaya
Christian Bautista and Rachel Ann Go


Di na maalala pa’no nagsimula
Ikaw ang laging nasa isip ko bawat araw
Laging ikaw ang aking nakikita
Ano ba ang nadarama ko ‘pag ikaw ay kasama

Ganyan din ang nadarama ko
Tuwing ika’y lalapit sa akin
Ako’y parang natutulala
Di ko malaman ang sasabihin ko

[Chorus]
Pag-ibig nga kaya
Pareho ang nadarama
Ito ba ang simula
Di na mapipigilan
Pag-ibig nga ito
Sana’y ‘di matapos ang nadaramang ito
Pag-ibig nga kaya ito (pag-ibig nga kaya ito), ooh
Pagkat nararamdaman, pag-ibig ating natagpuan

Malalaman mo lamang
Ang nararamdaman
Na ako ay magiging ikaw
Damdamin nati’y magsama

Laman ng puso ko’y ganyan din (hah)
Ikaw ay narito sa akin
Di ko hahayaang mawalay
Dito ka sa aking piling

repeat Chorus]

Gagawin lahat (gagawin lahat)
Upang ‘di magkalayo (upang ‘di magkalayo)
Dito lang ako, di kita iiwan
Kahit sandali di ko papayagan mawalay ka sa akin

[repeat Chorus
[repeat Chorus]

Only Reminds Me Of You
MYMP

I see you, beside me
It’s only a dream
A vision of what used to be
The laughter, the sorrow
Pictures in time
Fading to memory
How could I ever let you go
Is it too late to let you know

[chorus]

I try to run from your side
But each place I hide
It only reminds me of you
When I turn out all the lights
Even the night
It only reminds me of you
I needed my freedom
This what I’ve thought
But I was a fool to believe
My heart lied while you cried
Rivers of tears
But I was too blind to see
Everything we’ve been through before
Now it means so much more

[repeat chorus]

Only you
So come back to me
I’m down on my knees
Boy can’t you see
How could I ever let you go
Is it too late to let you know

[repeat chorus 2x]

"Dreaming With A Broken Heart"
John Mayer


When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll outta bed and down on your knees
And for the moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering was she really here?
Is she standing in my room?
No she's not, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....
When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part
She takes you in with your crying eyes
Then all at once you have to say goodbye
Wondering could you stay my love?
Will you wake up by my side?
No she can't, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....
Oooooooooohhhhhhhhh
Now do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Baby won't you get them if i did?
No you won't, 'cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone....
When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

If We Fall In Love
Rj Jimenez andYeng Constantino

There will be no ordinary days for you
‘Cause there is someone that cares like I do
You will have no reason to be sad anymore
I am always ready with a smile
With just one glimpse of you

[Refrain]
You don’t have to search no more‘
Cause I am someone who will love you for sure

[Chorus]
So if we fall in love maybe we’ll sing this song as one
If we fall in love we can write a better song than this
If we fall in love we will have that melody in our head
If we fall in love anywhere with you would be a better place

You can watch that movie in a different light
I will be right there beside you hugging you oh so tight (oh so tight)
How can love feels so cold and empty again
And I will keep on holding on and won’t let go (and won’t let go)

[repeat Refrain and Chorus]


Feel so good when you’re around
One smile from you (one smile from you) and I just feel so bright

[repeat Chorus]


wla lang. i just love this song bagay na bagay siya sa princess hour.to think na it's new song.maybe fate did ginawa ni rj para bumagay sa princess hours.at para din ito kna yeng and rj kc bagay na bagay cla.

Maundy Thursday

Pinanood ko ung korean movie Maundy Thursday last week starring my crushee kang dong won and lee na young. Hindi naman siya boring. Thank God kasi it's a serious type of movie,drama talaga at higit sa lahat maganda talaga ang story. It's a story about Yun Soo, a convicted death row criminal for committing massacre and the tumultous life of a former singing star Yu-Jeong who is bitter with her mother. They met in the most unusual place to meet and fall in love,inside the jail. Yu-jeong is a sister's niece who frequently visits the prisoners at the jail and one of them is Yun-soo. Yun-soo is very cold during their first encounters and so as with Sister Monica.

Yun-soo had been through a lot since childhood,the world was so cruel for him. He lost everything form being a father,having a son and a family,his brother,his mother. He wanted to die so bad that he ever wanted to die with his brother. He wanted to live but he could do nothing.

Yu-jeong has had many failed suicide attemps and everytime she wakes up alive gives her a lot more reason to hate herself and her mother. She promised her aunt that she will be frequently visiting the prisoners. But when she found out why Yun-soo was convicted, she coudn't muster up her courage to face him and do what she had promised.

What started out as a very awkward meeting develops up for something the two of them didn't expect of. Yu-jeong founds solace within Yun-soo and Yun-soo on the other hand too. Both totally different persons understand each other at the midst of death and hatred and with this comes a love no one could ever known.They're both troubled, one who is hiding a deep secret that causes her hatred to her mother and one who is also a hiding a secret that he wasn't actually the only one responsible for all the killings. She found the trust in him and told him her a secret that she was raped by her cousin when she was 15 but her mother didn'y believe her and he told his as well. They continue to develop a strong relationship in which both know won't last for long for he's on his way for his destiny chosen by the law.

I really cried watching this, so hard that I couldn't stop myself from doing so. At that time, that he was called by the guards to get himself ready, I started really crying hard beacuse I knew it was the time they want him to be.But what hurts me is that he didn't kill all of those people. Yes, he may have killed one but if he could have told them the truth then maybe he didn't die. I came to a thinking about Korea's criminal law if it is really like that.I even hope that somehow in my herat he will survived. But you know the most heratbreaking part was when he was saying his last words. He stood up and thanked all those people who understood him,Sister Monica,Officer Lee and Yu-jeong.And then he suddenly called out Yu-jeong's name shouting if she can hear him or see him. He thanked her for everything and he appreciate everything she did for him and he said he love her. That's when it really struck me to tears. To see the one you love die and that you can do nothing and to see the one you love for the last moment of your life.

Kang Dong won did a very great performance and he carried off the role very good that I was moved into tears so much. As well as with Lee Na young who did an amazing performance.

I really love this movie a lot. It's one of the best Korean movies ever of the new generation. It's one of my best also from those which I've seen so far. It's not just drama,all crying, it has a strong intense story you could never get out with when it has caught you.