Thursday, May 31, 2007

Home
Chris Daughtry

I'm staring out into the night,
Trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where love
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.

I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I'm going home.
Well I'm going home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
I've not always been the best man or friend for you.
But your love, remains true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

So I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.

Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all,
And then some you don't want.
Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Oh, well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old.
So I'm going home.
I'm going home.
CaTcH mE iM fALLinG
tOnI gOnZaGa
Theme Song: Which Star Are You From?

catch me i'm fallin
toni gonzaga

i don't know why
but when i look in your eyes
i felt something that seems so right

you've got yours i've got mine
i think i'm loosing my mind
coz i shouldn't feel this way

catch me i'm falling for you
and i don't know what to do

how can time be so wrong
feel so right all along
catch me i'm falling for you
how can time be so wrong
for love to come along
catch me i'm falling for you

maybe someday i see
why love did this to me
coz i can't go all along pretending
that love isn't here to stay
catch me i'm falling for you...ohhh

catch me i'm falling for you....
how can time be so wrong
feel so right all along
catch me i'm falling for you..

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

I Can't Make You Love Me
Nina

Turn down the lights, turn down the bed
Turn down these voices inside my head
Lay down with me, tell me no lies
Just hold me close, don’t patronize
Don’t patronize me

‘Cause I can’t make you love me If you don’t
You can’t make your heart feel something it won’t
Here in the dark in these final hours
I will lay down my heart, and I’ll feel the power
But you won’t, no you won’t
And I can’t make you love me
If you don’t

I’ll close my eyes and then I won’t see
The love you do not feel, when you’re holding me
Morning will come, and I’ll do what’s right
Just give me till then, to give up this fight
And I will give up this fight

And I can’t make you love me if you don’t
You can’t make your heart feel something it won’t
And here in the dark in these final hours
I will lay down my heart and I’ll feel the power
But you won’t, no, you won’t
And I can’t make you love me
If you don’t

Ain’t no use in you trying
It’s no good for me baby without love
All my tears, all these years, everything I believed in
Baby
Oh yeah
Someone’s gonna love me

Saturday, May 26, 2007

deathrow

ika nga ng kapita-pitagang debater professor na si Sir Joeven... "at the end of the day, kailangan alam natin kung ano ba ang tunay na happiness na naaachieve natin sa lahat ng ating mga natamo o ginagawa." { this message was crop courtesy of blurred crystals.}

kakagraduate ko lang at di pa talaga naaalis sa sistema ko ang buhay kolehiyala.sana nag-aaral na lang ako,wlang katapusang pag-aaral.pag nag-aaral ka wla kang ibang problema, basta ipasa mo lahat ng subjects mo me allowance ka pa araw araw at pwede ka gumimik kahit kelan.sana ganun na lang pero di pwede eh.kelangan natin lahat mag-grow.

pagkatapos ng mayo,isang buwan na ang nakakalipas mula nun april na grumaduate ako.pagdating sa sikap at tiyaga,wla na cguro makakatalo sakin.bakit?april pa lang nag-aapply na ako at kung san san na ako nag-apply.pero sa sawing palad wla ako nakuha sa mga inapplayan ko nun april.ngayong mayo naman dapat me trabaho na ako.masayang masaya pa naman ako nun natanggap ako.inapplyan ko xa dahil admin asst ang nakalagay.so kala ko parang secretary.nun nagsimula ako iba ang nadatnan ko.para rin akong call center agent.nakaupo lang buong maghapon at nagtatawag.filing ko mamamatay na ako sa sobrang pagkaboring ng ginagawa ko.parang mccraan na ako.mag-iisang linggo pa lang ako pero di na ko nakatiis at umalis na ako.sabi ni kuya wag daw muna ako umalis hangat wla ako lilipatan.pero mahirap din maghanap habang andun pa ko.

ayoko kc ung tipo ng trabaho na nakaupo ka lang.di gumagalaw ang mga buto buto mo.di gumagalaw ang utak mo.pag ganun kc di ako matututo eh parang nakakulong lang ako sa iisang mundo,mundo ng pagtatawag.pero sa hirap ng buhay kung wla pa din ako makuha na trabaho nitong katapusan ng mayo,wla ako choice kundi magkol center muna.di ko naman sinasara ang pinto ko dito eh.ang punto ko lang ayoko magsettle agad sa kol center dahil eto ang madali,mabilis at malaki ang bayad.willing naman ako mag-umpisa sa mababang sweldo eh.kung gusto mo matuto kelangan mo mag-umpisa sa mababa.ako kc kung meron pa namang iba jan bakit ako magkokol center.ayoko sana pero kung wla pa din talaga,xempre last choice na.

filing ko kaming mga bagong graduates ay nasa deathrow.para kaming mga convicts na pag di ka nakahanap ng trabaho patay ka na.di ba ung mga convicts na asa deathrow alam na nila kung kelan ang huling araw nila sa mundo.kami naman siguro mga 3 0 4 buwan mula nun grumaduate ka ang deadline.pag lumamapas ka dun bitay ka na.

pero ako mas malala,parang katapusan na ng buhay ko pag di pa ko nagkatrabaho sa huling linggo ng mayo.filing ko ako ung pinakamabigat ang kaso sa lahat ng mga convicts na asa deathrow at ito ay sa kadahilanang cum laude pa ako.mabigat ang tungkulin na nakaatang sa akin at mas nararapat lamang na me mapatunayan ako.gusto ko sana sa june eh makapagsimula na ako.sa tingin ko naman di ako nagkukulang sa sipag at tiyaga at sa dasal.tiwala naman ako sa Diyos na di nia ako pababayaan dahil all this time di nia ako iniwan.


kea ako umalis dun sa dapat ay una kong trabaho dahil totoo ang sinabi ni kapita-pitagang Sir Joeven. At the end of the day,iisipin mo at kailangan alam mo kung ano ba ang kaligayahan na natatamo mo sa ginagawa mo.kaya cguro ayaw kong mag-kol center hanggat me iba pa dahil iniisip ko at the end of every day,anu nga ba ang kasiyahan na nakukha ko sa ginagawa ko.di ko rin naman masisi ang iba dahil praktikal lang sila,maaaring breadwinner kc cla.desisyon natin ang buhay natin kea di ko rin masisisi ang iba dahil kania kaniang choice tau.


kung tutuusin lahat ng tao ay nasa deathrow.maski mayaman ka man,mahirap o average man.dahil lahat tau ay may mga deadline.lahat tau ay may hinahabol at gustong gawin sa buhay.


nahihirapan na din ako at halos nawawalan na ako ng pag-asa pero di pa pwede sumuko dahil nagsisimula pa lang ako. at sinisiguro ko na di ako dadatnan ng katapusan.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Tell it to the Future
written 6/22/2006

It’s been seven years and seven months. That was in the year 1998 when I first met him. We were first year high schools then and he seemed to be a nice guy. He was very quiet, he barely talked during classes and most of the time I didn't recognize him in class. He was just another guy like anybody else around; this was my first impression on him.


A year passed and he didn't even know my name. We’re still classmates and just that nothing changed. But I was wrong; I thought it’s always going to be like that. He seemed to be not the guy I first saw that year. He changed a lot, he was such a whiner and he was very annoying. So he caught my attention but we were not in so good terms. We we're enemies, we we're not friends. As he began to annoy me each day of that year, something came up and it was unbelievable. I was slowly falling for him and I was unaware of it. I couldn't accept it because he was not the guy I imagined to be meant for me. But I denied it even if it was true. He had a crush that time, she was our classmate too. We parted ways the end of the school year as pure enemies. I never gave a hint that I actually liked him.

So another year came and he was still my classmate. This time, the feeling got even stronger but I always kept it in some place hidden. And things got more complicated this time around. An upper-class student had a crush on him and he told me before that he didn't like her. But to my surprise during our last year in high school I found out that she was already his girlfriend. I didn't ask him why or how it happened. I just acted like it was nothing to me and I was being unfair to myself but I had no choice.

We graduated but I never told him the truth because it's not right. I remember he gave me a candle of color blue with something shaped like a dolphin in the middle. I really love it because it was the only gift I have ever received from him.
We are now in our last year in college and I still manage to keep it and i have decided to keep it forever. She's still his girlfriend I think. But now we are friends and I'm just his friend. Though even if they happen to broke up, I still don't stand a chance that he would finally see me. It hurts that the person you love cannot love you back. But if in the future God will send him to me, I hope I still love him the way I love him now.

I surf the website of the movie The Lake house and there was an icon that says "TELL IT TO THE FUTURE". I saw letters there address to the future. I made a letter to myself that in the year 2012 when I will be 26 years old, if he is really meant for me then he will come and it will happen.

Monday, May 14, 2007

I Just Can't Live A Lie
Carrie Underwood


Lately nothing I do ever seems to please you
And maybe turning my back would be that much easier
Cause hurtful words are all that we exchange
But I can’t watch you walk away

Can I forget about the way it feels to touch you?
And all about the good times that we’ve been through
Could I wake up without you every day?
Would I let you walk away?

No, I can’t learn to live without
And I can’t give up on us now

(Chorus)
Oh, I know I could say were through
And tell myself I’m over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I'd fail cause I, I just can’t live a lie

Could I forget the look that tells me that you want me?
And all the reasons that make loving you so easy
The kiss that always makes it hard to breathe
The way you know just what I mean

No, I can’t learn to live without
Ohh, so don’t you give up on us now

Ohh, I know I could say were through
And tell myself I’m over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I'd fail cause I, I just can’t live a lie

Ohh, and I don’t wanna try

Ohhhh, I know I could say were through
And tell myself I’m over you
But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I'd fail cause I, I just can’t live a lie

I just can’t live a lie

But even if I made a vow
I promise not to miss you now
And try to hide the truth inside
I fail cause I, I just can’t live a lie

Oh, I cant live a lie x2
Don't Forget to Remember Me
Carrie Underwood

18 years have come and gone
For momma they flew by
But for me they drug on and on
We were loading up that Chevy
Both tryin' not to cry
Momma kept on talking
Putting off good-bye
Then she took my hand and said
"Baby don't forget:

Before you hit the highway
You better stop for gas
There's a 50 in the ashtray
In case you run short on cash
Here's a map and here's a Bible
If you ever lose your way

Just one more thing before you leave
Don't forget to remember me"

This downtown apartment sure makes me miss home
and those bills there on the counter
Keep telling me I'm on my own
And just like every Sunday I called momma up last night
And even when it's not, I tell her everything's all right
Before we hung up I said
"Hey momma, don't forget:

to tell my baby sister I'll see her in the fall
And tell me-maw that I miss her
Yeah, I should give her a call
And make sure you tell Daddy that I'm still his little girl
Yeah I still feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be
Don't forget to remember me"

Tonight I find myself kneeling by the bed to pray
I haven't done this in a while
So I don't know what to say but
Lord, I feel so small sometimes in this big ol' place
Yeah, I know there are more important things, but
Don't forget to remember me
Don't forget to remember me
"These Open Arms"
Clay Aiken

What if everything you ever took for granted, was gone?
And everything you ever thought was right, was wrong?
And what if everyone you ever loved was torn, from the pages of your life?
Would you reach out for tomorrow, or try to turn back time?

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between what's left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you

Did you really love the ones you said you loved, think twice.
And did you make a bit of difference in somebody elses life?
Tell me, is there someone you can count on when you need a friend?
Can you see I need a friend?

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between whats left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you

Surrendering high
Give in, stop questioning why
Open your heart up to love & you'll see you will find

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between what's left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you
A Thousand Days
Clay Aiken.

Through my eyes,
I have seen the world start spinning like a ball.
Stars light up and then fall for you.
So then what's a man like me supposed to do?
If I gave you the moon would you notice,
That I'm right beside you?

Well now a thousand days and thousand nights are not enough.
Cause I can't hold back the way I feel about my love.
Won't let it go, won't let it go.

And if the angels came, I'd fight them back to win your soul.
And when everything was said and done
They'd go back home.
And they oughta know, they oughta know.
That you're mine all mine

In my world,
You're the sun that shines and lights up the evening skies.
Clearing up the horizon, hold on.
Come with me and I will never let you down
Oh, and in this love we'll drown, this I promise you.
Cause they can't hold us down.
[ A Thousand Days lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]

Well now a thousand days and thousand nights are not enough
Cause I can't hold back the way I feel about my love
Won't let it go, won't let it go.

And if the angels came, I'd fight them back to win your soul.
And when everything was said and done they'd go back home.
And they oughta know, they oughta know.
That you're mine all mine

I would do anything, just believe it.
Your love means everything ,and I need it.
Your heart won't lie,
Reach out for me...

Well now a thousand days and thousand nights are not enough.
Cause I can't hold back the way I feel about my love.
Won't let it go, won't let it go.
Cause you're mine all mine.

And if the angels came, I'd fight them back to win your soul.
And when everything was said and done they'd go back home.
They oughta know, they oughta know.
That you're mine all mine
"Starts With Goodbye"

I was sitting on my doorstep,
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,
But I knew I had to do it,
And he wouldn't understand,
So hard to see myself without him,
I felt a piece of my heart break,
But when you're standing at a crossroad,
There's a choice you gotta make.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

I know there's a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye.

Time, time heals,
The wounds that you feel,
Somehow, right now.

[Chorus:]
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
I guess it's gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I've loved,
To get to the other side,
Starts with goodbye,
The only way you try to find,
Moving on with the rest of your life,
Starts with goodbye,
Na na na na na na na.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

It Rained... hard

May 10,2007


Nakakainis tong araw na to eh. Panu ba naman umulan ng malakas. Pero before that me nakakainis pang iba. Asa skul ako kc nga kinuha ko ung uniform ni Jackie sa skul. Tapos naginternet ako para makita ko nga sana ung video in jen pero wla tinanggal na ata ung video.Tapos mga 3:30PM me tumawag,syempre cnu pa nga ba di ba. Pumunta na lang daw ako sa terminal gudluk naman.Eh mejo nagbabadya na ang ulan ng mga oras na yun at ayoko pa umalis. Kun pwede nga lang eh sana pinadala na lang niya ung uniform. At sinabihan pa ko maarte. Eh kasi naman kung sana sinabi nia before na magkita tau ng ganito eh di sana ok eh wla naman eh.Ayun nagmamadali tuloy ako.Siempre umuwi pa ako,nagpalit ako. Pagdating ko dito sa bahai eh tumatawag na naman pero di naman nagsasalita tapos tumawag ulit bilisan ko daw. Pagdating ko dun nakita ko na siya agad at yung mama niya. Nakakahiya tuloy ako dun. Siguro dahil kaharap ko ang nanay ng taong lihim na minamahal ko.Tapos umalis na ako agad. Pagalis ko saka biglang umulan ng malakas. Wla ng lingon lingon diretso lang ako.



Tapos mga 7Pm ata ngtxt siya,salamat daw. Salamat siya dyan!Sabi ko salamat lang,eh si jacky nga inaaya mo pang ilibre,so unfair!Sinisingil ko na din kasi sia sa 100 dahil di ko pera un eh.So un nga papunta na nga sia dito sa bahay. Nun sabi nia na lumabas na ako. Cge labas ako pagtingin ko ayun naglalakad na kea naghintay na lang ako sa me labas ng gate.Maya maya narealize ko bat parang antagal at di pa din siya lumalapit.Pagtingin ko wla na sia,wla naman sia dun sa inuupuan nia nung wednesday. Hanap ako ng hanap pero wla ako makita. Ang tagal ko kea naghanap dapat papasok na ako. Tapos nakatalikod kc ako sa bahai biglang me gumulat sakin sa likod,sa part pa naman na me kiliti ako. Dahil sa gulat napasigaw ako. nakakahiya tuloy dahil me mga ibang tao nun sa labas. kainis talaga sia. Di man lang ako nakaganti sa kania.Binigai lang nia ung 100 the umalis na sia.



Tapos ngtxt sia,nahihia na daw sia skin.Pero ililibre nia sana ako pero mini stop lang yan ba nag nahihia?!Tapos biglang umulan ng malakas. Tinxt ko sia kung me payong sia,wla daw at basa na daw si habang naglalakad.Cra talaga di ba?!Nakita na ngang umulan kanina,di pa nagdala ng payong at naglakad pa. bakit daw di ko sia hinabol para payongan. Eh ba malay ko ba kung asan na sia nun umulan.Ayaw ko lang daw purke me work na ako. Anu naman connection nito?Nakakalimutan ko na daw sia. My God kung nakakalimutan ko na sia di sana di ko na ginagawa ang mga ginagawa ko.Hindi daw sia magkakasakit at bakit dadalawin ko daw ba sia pag nagkasakit sia.Hai nagpapaimportante na naman.Pero mabuti naman at nakauwi na din sia. Wish ko lang di ako nagdilang anghel sa pagkakasakit nia.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Reconciled?

May 7,2007 around 6:30PM

Should I call this reconciliation or what?!Dunno. Let's just assume it was okay.Atleast I didn't eat up my pride cause I wasn't the first one to "make paramdam" right! Cause it wasn't really only my fault. I was again doing my rounds at home,cooking and dishwashing. I did not have my phone with me. Someone's using it so I had no clue that someone's texting me. When I managed to get hold of it,I had four messages,all from the same person.( THE INSENSITIVE!)He said that he's coming by to u know give the claiming stub but that was 6:30PM and I read his text at 7:30PM.And his following text said that he was now outside and saying that I should reply. But ofcourse when I went out to see him,he wasn't there cause he already went home. Now,tell me my conscience,am I making him feel taken for granted? Maybe,quite. Sometimes,he needs to feel this once in a while. Then I said, he should just come some other time since he went home already. And that he shouldn't come from 6Pm to 8PM but too late he was already outside. I went out and he was there,so far from the gates of my house. At first, I screened him before going to him. And he had this new phone again! From his sweetheart Fabio again?!What's with him changing phones from time to time?!Nagyayabang ata to eh!

We acted like nothing happened. We're really weird. We fight and the next day we're okay without even any explanations or sorrys.We talked like we're very ok. We talked like I wasn't angry at him before. We talked like he didn't act "paimportansiya" before.I was used to him getting away like air so fast so I initiated it that he should go. But supringsingly, he said I should stay so we can talk. So fine with me we talk. About many things,why the hell is he telling everyone that I was a Cum Laude.His new damn gorgeous phone.His condo? That he's bored and he wants me to go there. That I'm pushing him to Jacky.That he didn't make sundo Jacky.His sisters uniform and school opening. Just those. And he was so makulit at making reminders that I should text him.

I don't really understand this kind of relationship we have or have we?!It's so weird and unusual cause we're not committed yet he's making me act like one.I can't figure him out. He's my friend yet I do not know still how his mind works since we weren't close during highschool. I just hope this kind of way we have doesnt go for long. BUt ofcourse I don't want to end it, I just want to clear things out so we can really be reconciliated.
Insensitive

May 05,2007 around 8:30PM

I was so busted with him. First is because maybe I was jealous. Second,is because he was so unreasonable and INSENSITIVE as always. He sent me a message around 6:30PM saying that he'll come by to give me the claiming stub. I didn't reply. Then he didn't show up. I was expecting him since I do this most of the time I just reply if he shouldn't come cause I'm not home yet. His defense was cause I didn't reply so he thought I wasn't home. I said, "That's it then ok don't give it to me anymore". He sensed that I was "masungit" that night. Then I said he shouldn't ask why. Then he laugh about it and joke about it. I flared up cause it wasn't funny ok!And I wasn't able to reply cause I'm doing something. Know what he said?! " Am I that least important which is not even worth a single text?"Wow! How dare he ever utter those words to me. I got angry cause how could he said that to me after everything I did for him and that was all he could say just cause I couldn't reply to him once. I don't deserve those words, I don't! I didn't get his point immediately but when I read it again,I understood it so I texted him. " If u don't want to talk to me,then let me talk. I didn't say that ur that least important,I just said I was doing something. And if that is true,then I shouldn't have been helping u all this time. So after all,u weren't really noticing and appreciating my help and efforts all those times cause you're saying this to me."

Friday, May 04, 2007

Wait For You
Elliott Yamin.


I never felt nothing in the world like this before
Now I’m missing you and I’m wishing you would come back through my door
Why did you have to go?
You could have let me know; so now I’m all alone

Girl you could have stayed but you wouldn’t give me a chance
With you not around it’s a little bit more than I can stand
And all my tears they keep runnin’ down my face
Why did you turn away?

So why does your pride make you run and hide
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it’s a lie what you keep inside
This is not how you want it to be

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don’t know what else I can do
Don’t tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I find it just ain’t true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do
I’ll wait for you

Been a long time since you called me
(How could you forget about me)
You gotta be feeling crazy
How can you walk away
(When) Everything stays the same
I just can’t do it baby

What will it take to make you come back
Girl I told you what it is and it just ain’t like that
Why can’t you look at me?
You’re still in love with me

Don’t leave me crying

Baby why can’t we just start all over again
Get it back to the way it was
If you give me a chance I can love you right
But you’re telling me it won’t be enough

So baby I will wait for you
Cause I don’t know what else I can do
Don’t tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I find it just ain’t true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do
I’ll wait for you

So why does your pride make you run and hide
Are you that afraid of me?
But I know it’s a lie what you’re keeping inside
That is not how you want it to be

Baby I will wait for you
Baby I will wait for you
If it’s the last thing I do

Baby I will wait for you
Cause I don’t know what else I can do
Don’t tell me I ran out of time
If it takes the rest of my life

Baby I will wait for you
If you think I find it just ain’t true
I really need you in my life
No matter what I have to do
I’ll wait for you
I’ll be waiting …
Jealousy, Bitterness, Realization, Difference.

It was Thursday May 3,2007,10PM and I just came home from Mandaluyong and there was this big fire at Aberdeen Court in Quezon City that I just recently passed by. Alam mo un,kampante na ako kasi makakapagpahinga na ako tas bigla ako tinawag ni mg jay. Kala ko naman phone call hindi pala,paglabas ko ng door nakita ko si jacky,nabigla ako kc kahapon kausap ko lang xa. Tas paglingon ko andun pala c kennedy. Sabi ko magakasama kau,san kau galing sa kanila. Tapos un kwentuhan at me mga times na sila lang nagkakaintindihan kasi ung mga bestfriends nila eh naging mag-on kea di ako makakrelate.

Alam mo un,un simpleng magkasma sila sa gabi was not a good idea to me. Me history kasi yan eh,nun highschool kasi close yan until now naman lalo na naun na d2 na si jacky.So parang the mere thought of it na andito na siya at magkasama pa sila was like hell to me. Pero I'm not saying na I wasn't happy to see her. Siyempre natuwa naman ako un nga lang something related ke kennedy ang ayoko.Akala ko dala na niya ung claiming stub hindi pala.At nalaman ko na wla naman talga siyang planong pumunta dito. Ganito kasi yun eh,it's either c jacky ang una nagtxt at nagsabing pupunta sa kaniya o si keny and nagsabi ke jacky na pumunta sa kanila. Originally,ke keny lang dapat cla pumunta. Tas sinundo pa pala cya. At ililibre pa daw xa,wlang kadahi-dahilan yan ah.

Nasabi ko tuloy ke jacky tutal andito ka na kaw na lang tumulong sa kania,palitan mo na ako. Mas close nman kau eh,mas magka-vibes kau at mas maganda working relationship niyo kesa samin.Sabi ko yaan mo sasabihin ko sa kaniya for sure papayag lang yun wla ng tanung tanung lalo na't mas okay ang relationship nila ni jacky. Sabi ni jacky nagseselos daw ako. Oo pero natural hindi sabi ko. Siguro nahihiya lang yun sayo,sakin kasi wla siyang hiya eh kaya ayw niya humingi ng tulong ke jacky.Sabi nia mukha naman daw kami okay. Sa paningin ok kami,sa kaniya ok kami pero sakin di kami ok dahil sa ginagawa nia. Pero dahil di ako vocal natural di nia alam un. Dahil insensitive xa di nia alam un xempre.

Naun ko lang napatunayan ang pagkakaiba ng pakikitungo niya sakin compared sa iba. Tignan mo sinundo pa. Tignan mo inaya pa pumunta sa kanila,posibleng xa nag-aya eh. At si jacky pa ang nagsabi na pumunta sila dito hindi sia. At ililibre pa nia ng wlang kadahi-dahilan ah. Sakin,di nia ako sinusindo,inaaya,nililibre ng kusa at wlang dahilan. Di ba?!Bitter ako,oo. Kasalanan ko nman eh kung ba't bitter ako naun pero kahit ganun natural lang na maramdaman ko to.Naiinis ako kc lumalabas tuloy ung totoo na lahat ginagawa niya bilang bayad ng utang na loob lang at dahil obligado sia pero never na dahil willing sia.

Naisip ko nga ano kaya mararamdaman niya kung bigla na lang ako mawala sa buhay nia. Ung wla ng kaming blita talaga sa isa't isa. Pero nitong may 1,sabi nia kala ko me work ka na di ka na kasi nagttxt. So kahit panu me puso pa din xa at nararamdaman nniang di ako nagpaparamadam. Eh panu nga kung ung matagalan na talaga na parang di na talaga kmi nagkikita o nagkakausap? Mami-miss nia kea ako?malulungkot ba sia?!marerealize nia kea ang worth ko na di lang ako pang-taken for granted?O ordinary lang? Totoo nga ba na distance makes the heart grow funder?Oo mejo totoo to nun sinabi nia na di ka na kasi nagttxt pero panu nga kung mas matagal?Di ba dapat mas malalim at matindi ung mararamdaman nia?Pero mararamdaman nia kea kahit matagal pa?Finally, magiging sensitive na ba siya?